


Kasumi Gets Trolled

by EdamamiTomoe



Category: Love Live! School Idol Festival ALL STARS (Video Game), Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Crack, F/F, Song Lyrics, childhood ruined
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:09:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24566701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdamamiTomoe/pseuds/EdamamiTomoe
Summary: Nico trolls Kasumi with a blasphemous parody of the Spongebob Squarepants theme song.
Relationships: Nakasu Kasumi/Yazawa Nico
Comments: 3
Kudos: 14





	Kasumi Gets Trolled

**Author's Note:**

> This quarantine has sapped me of my ability to write and now all I can do is create this nonsense.

_Who shits in a pineapple under the seat?_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_Who fondles his nuts and squeezes his teat?_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_Who keeps fucking like rabbits who are in heat?_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_If you know him then start beating your meat!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebob... Squarepants!_

“NICOOOO!” Following the childishly jovial laughter of the 3rd year school idol is the maddened howling of the one and only Kasumi, whose wrath has been stoked like none others upon hearing the blasphemous mockery of a lyric spewing out from the mouth of her adversary. Her face red with anger and her fists clenched hard as a rock, she chases after the little gremlin and proclaims, “I AM GOING TO FELL YOU FOR RUINING MY CHILDHOOD!”

Fleeing the wrath of her 1st year acquaintance upon feet as light as her disposition, Nico weaves around the classroom, laughing and continuing to sing her parodic song, refusing to slow nor cease her instigation. She has, after all, the support of her lover, Nozomi Toujou, who stands by the corner of the room, watching with her arms folded and her approval met, calling out to her, “No, Nicochi, you’re doing great. Keep going. I love you!”

Emboldened by her girlfriend’s encouraging words, Nico once again sings, louder and prouder than before, evading the wild thrashing of her pursuer, her maddening lyrics pouring out.

_I am a genius for writing all this!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_So pull down your panties and go take a piss!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_Doing so will totally fill you with bliss!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_So what makes you think aught is amiss!_

Her blinding rage further stoked by the tauntings of Nico Yazawa, Kasumi chases after her prey with the mannerisms of a rabid dog. The faster she runs, the louder she snarls, as her feet strike at the heels of her prey again and again, gaining upon her faster than a beagle upon a bowl of broccolis. With her victory in sight, Kasumi begins howling a tune of her own, having completely lost all vestiges of a sound and rational mind.

_I fucking dare you to sing one more word_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_I’m going to eat you up like a bean curd!_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_I cannot fathom how you’re so absurd_  
_Spongebob Squarepants!_  
_Like, good God, Nico, are you a nerd!_

Kasumi pounces and pins down her prey.

_Spongebob Squarepants!_

Nico’s voice joins in the chorus.

_Spongebob Squarepants!_

Their gazes lock on with great intensity.

_Spongebob Squarepants!_

Their lips meet.

_Spongebob Squarepants!_

Their eyes close.

_Spongebob... Squarepants!_

The curtains close.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a pretty good ship, oh don't you know?  
> KasuNico!  
> I barely know LL All Stars, however though!  
> KasuNico!  
> I implore you to add to the rarepair depot!  
> KasuNico!  
> So open a doc and brew up some joe!  
> KasuNico!
> 
> KasuNico, KasuNico,  
> KasuNico, Kasu... Nico!


End file.
